The Niceties of Life
“I did not attend his funeral; but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain
Niceness is the zeitgeist of today. When our ancestors look back through the filter of time, what is it that they will find noteworthy about the people who live in this century? It will not be our valour, nor our cruelty. In both, we have been far surpassed by our forefathers. Nor are our achievements in the arts likely to stand out, as there have been golden ages in the past far more refined than our own period. It will not be our reason, intellectual insight, or mental agility, since these qualities have been in abundance well before the dawn of this century.
By “niceness” I do not mean any kind of genuine or heartfelt sentiment. Niceness originates not from a desire to please others but from the desire to be well thought of – a self-serving urge. Niceness is a faade, erected amid a culture of narcissism. Genuine kindness is the opposite of niceness; its inverse, to the extent whereby the two cannot co-exist. Kindness is intended to make others feel good; niceness is a tool used to encourage them to be (or at least seem) kind to you.
This niceness should not be confused for genuine kindness or goodness. It is, at its root, an obsession with being thought well of, not merely by our peers, but by the entire TV audience. Niceness is a sham; sugar-coated narcissism. What lies behind kindness is genuine caring for the other. The energy behind niceness is somehow cloying, as if you were imploring someone to like you. The former is generous, the latter obsequious. The former comes from strength, the latter from weakness. Where one flourishes, the other cannot. Kindness and niceness are mutually exclusive.
Political correctness is niceness elevated to the level of philosophy. It is the new orthodoxy, literally defining North American society. It is reflected in the media, in our laws, in our politics. Being politically correct in your presentation is not a matter of choice; it is a social mandate. Taking any strong position on any topic is tantamount to social suicide. These days, someone being politically incorrect is the equivalent of having spoken out against the party in the Soviet Union or decrying Christian values in the Victorian era. For instance, even the vaguest suggestion that the game exists, is a complete faux pas in the politically correct world. If one is foolish enough to press the point, one risks become a social pariah.
And the result of these machinations? A world devoid of colour and expression; a bland world of sameness and conformity: in a word, a world of niceness.
And all this is the work of the Players who have trapped us in their Game. Equipped with false sentiment and the shield of politically correct jargon to cover their retreat, they set themselves up as the great positive proponents of negativity. Anyone who objects is excluded from the society they now govern. They have taken our rights and our liberties and constructed a prison for our minds. And everything has been done without the slightest impediment because, whatever else they may be, they are unstintingly nice about it all!
John Berling Hardy gives you the inside track on how to play the hidden game which is there in every one of life’s social arenas. For more of his writings please visit www.playingtheplayers.com
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